First dates are a little… interesting.  You and your partner in crime for the evening decide to meet at a local watering hole for a brewski (that’s Polish for beer).  You are the first one there.

Circle One:    Do you:

A)  Grab a seat at the bar and order your first drink                        or

B)   Sit by the door and wait for them to get there

I hope that you put your finger up to your computer screen and drew a little make believe circle around letter A.

If you choose option B, it adds to the awkwardness around the first ‘Hello’.

Here are the options for the initial greeting and my take on what they mean…

Handshake -  “Hey, I want to play nice… but I don’t know about you”.

The High Five – Only acceptable if you follow it up with a “down low, too slow” and the other party gets to punch you directly in the face or turn around and walk out the door.

The Fist Pound – “You might as well just leave now or order a couple rounds of Tequila just to forget about how ridiculous that was.”  If the Prez can do it, can’t you?   NO!

The Lloyd Christmas – If you can pull it off, more power to you.

A hug (of the 2 second duration variety) – “Very nice to meet you! Now let’s grab a drink already.” Don’t do the Ass Out hug like you are at a seventh grade dance and try to avoid the awkward handshake that turns into a hug.

The first hello is what sets the tone of the whole night (and possibly relationship).  If you have gotten to the point of going on a date, you are at the point to step in and give a hug and say ‘Nice to meet you’ or ‘Nice to see you again’.

Don’t listen to your mother.  Say ‘Hi’ to strangers.  You may be surprised by who you meet!

-Reed

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As for a first date, I have already spoken to the fact that first dates have the possibility to be a little awkward and how an exit strategy needs to be in place.  With that said, I know that having a whole meal of food, is a typical first date idea.  Thinking of places that are acceptable and still shows a little bit of your character is what is key.

I don’t think picking up the check for the first meal and seeing it just shy of 100 bucks is the goal, but try to shy away from places that rhyme with Dead Mobster or Shmolive Shmarden.  These are the places you go in college with friends or with your guys to get your hands on the second most sought after title, right behind the Fantasy Football bragging rights for dominating the league even after your first pick, pretty boy Tom Brady, gets hurt in the first quarter of the season.  This semi-annual title consists of eating the most bowls of pasta in the name of gluttony and manliness when they have the never-ending pasta bowl.  The caveat to going to a fine establishment such as this is if your first date is also part of a scavenger hunt and you need to get a picture of someone wearing a scrunchy or sporting a sweet mullet and the state fair isn’t in session.  (Side Note:  the adjective sweet need not be used in association with mullets because we all know that is already a given.)

The most important part is picking a place that shows a little of your personality and style in it.  I am not suggesting taking a date to a place that has a lot of brah’s (Definition taken directly from urbandictionary.com: brah: Possbily the most annoying term that stupid college/high school guys use to talk to their friends. It’s slang for bro which is short for brother. Neither or either of the latter need any abbreviation or slang because they’re stupid terms to refer to a friend to begin with.) who sport their new haircuts and whose favorite things include Muscle Milk and Jagerbombs …. Unless that is your style. If you are taking someone to a place that is way out of your price range or you don’t even like the type of ethnic food they are serving, you aren’t being yourself.  If food is going to be involved, try a place like Buffalo Wild Wings to see if the other person can get their hands dirty and let loose a little or your local neighborhood bar or mom and pop restaurant that is known for their burgers.  These locations are pretty comfortable and will show your creativity.

Remember, a girl likes a guy with a plan and that can come up with something to do instead of always leaving it up to her.  Give her a few options if you don’t know her style. Another idea is to go to a place you have been before.  You will probably be more comfortable.

Don’t listen to your mother.  Say ‘Hi’ to strangers.  You may be surprised by who you meet!

-Reed

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After a few drinks at a townie bar in the Northwoods (where they didn’t know what Wild Turkey was even though they had more taxidermy on the walls than in a Cabela’s and maybe even a Big Mouth Billy Bass), some friends and I  got to talking about dating. This glorious watering hole is a place where the usual conversation revolves around how Brett Favre will always be a Packer, old fishing stories and the count down to hunting season.  With that being said, there were plenty of strangers willing to share their perspective.

Since the last few articles were about the bar scene, I was talking and asking about the preferred communication method when you meet someone new.  After knocking around the idea of the “can I get your digits (*See Footnote) approach?”, I came to the conclusion that there is a 24 hour window for communication.  The 3-day rule does NOT apply however being overzealous is always bad.  If you meet someone after 9pm, you are allowed one (singular, not plural) text message that evening (unless responded to) and should be kept to a “I look forward to getting to know you, coffee this week?” or “You just missed a Steven Seagal look-a-like”.  Multiple texts that night which are not responded to will throw you into the ‘booty call’ category.  This is where the tricky part comes in.  Whoever asks for the number (regardless of which bathroom you use) has 24 hours to contact the other person before the other person chariot turns into a pumpkin.  Even if this is a text that says something along the lines of “I put you in my phone as ‘cute girl – (insert bar name where you met)’ … would you like to grab a drink?”.   If you send more than 2 texts or a call without a response, STOP.  Do not pass Go, Do not collect $200 dollars.  You don’t want to fall in to the category of the “Put the lotion in the basket” Guy.  Chalk it up as an experience.

Apart from the digits, things that were talked about were people asking for someone’s email address or for their name to ‘friend’ them on facebook.  I can partially understand the email thing since it is a little less invasive than a direct line of communication.  Jury is still out on that.  On the other hand, the facebook connection borders extremely creepy on the dating front…. Like Jeffrey Dahmer creepy.  This pretty much is asking for permission to stalk a perfect stranger by looking through all their pictures way too prematurely.

Let’s try to get back to the days of the morning paper, the milkman, and asking a guy or girl out.  Not via facebook or twitter, but by asking for the number and then actually calling…. Or at the very least, a playful text.

*Footnote:  It’s not acceptable to use the term, digits, when asking for a number.

Don’t listen to your mother.  Say ‘Hi’ to strangers.  You may be surprised by who you meet!

-Reed

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Alright, so you didn’t meet anyone this week over some Chunky Monkey® or while taking Fido out on his nightly walk.  You go out on Saturday with a few friends.  Hopping on the vinyl saddle at your local watering hole and you start to put out the vibe.  You see that special person a couple seats down, gaining a little courage by taking that last little sip or gulp or downing the rest of your Appletini.  After dismounting that tall saddle, you take a few small steps and open your mouth to say a few words.  This is where the problem arises….

Now I’m not saying that it’s easy to talk to someone and hope that you hit it off without waving the white surrender flag.  Technology has taken hold of our society and people are far more comfortable sending an email or text message as compared to actually calling someone or writing a letter, the scope of communication has changed.  This applies to the dating scene as well and in this case, the bar.

In the ‘hello’ stage at the bar, guys try to spit hot game with cheesy pickup lines that boarder ridiculous.  Don’t get me wrong I have a favorite pickup line that I heard from a good friend that involves polar bears but I definitely don’t involve inquiries in to what type of pancakes someone likes, asking if they were made in heaven, or how good ones clothes would look artistically arranged on ones floor.  My idea would be to try the newest innovative approach that is recommended by 9 out of 10 dentists.  Show your pearly whites and say ‘Hi’.  The ability to be laid back and show a non-aggressive approach can be something that may lower the Terror Threat Level from a daunting red to a more manageable colder color.  This could help increase the length of conversation from a mere blink or two to the opportunity to get another round of Appletinis.

Don’t listen to your mother.  Say ‘Hi’ to strangers.  You may be surprised by who you meet!

-Reed

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